Yes peeps, that’s right.

Inappropriate crushes.

Where you fall head over heels for someone whether you’ve met them or not and you feel your whole world get tipsy and giddy and you start feeling and acting like a schoolgirl on crack then you feel like a complete knob because he doesn’t know you exist and you feel like a fool for the way you feel.

Yes, believe me, I’ve had many a crush on many a guy/muso/tv personality/actor. Although when I thought about it, it turned out to be the character over the actor.

How?

Watching a show the character acts a particular way, and for some reason it’s the way you want a man to be with you in that moment of your life. You want their mental or physical strength, their hands to manhandle you, their minds to meet yours, their mouths to…you know what I mean.

The problem is, if you’re single, it’s worse.

The whole Twilight Twihard saga comes to mind, where girls are dumping their boyfriends and partners because they’re NOT like Edward.

IT’S A FUCKING CHARACTER GIRLS!!!!

HE’S A FUCKING VAMPIRE!!!

Although I did have a crush on Spike from Buffy, it was more because of his vulnerability and coz he was cute and had a cute way about him.

And sure, I wouldn’t mind him biting my neck but that’s not the point.

It is worse if you’re single, because you don’t have that body beside you keeping you warm and tingly and so you feel lonely and alone. And that in itself is hard to deal with, especially if you’ve been on your own for awhile and have no one to share your ups and downs with and well…..have….. S.E.X with.

Women go through this every time they’re single. How many times do you need to watch Dr. Phil to see the desperation about that.

And behaviour would come into that as well. The boss of David Jones, a department store here in Aus, just resigned due to inappropriate behaviour.

So, I’ve been there done that so many times it’s ridiculous, and I know my reasons for it and believe me I’m desperate for those reasons to become extinct. But the universe has it’s own way and time and patience is not my strong suit even though I’m trying to strengthen my weak spots it’s taking FOR.EV.AH!!!!!

Tell me of your inappropriate crushes peeps. Was it on a co-worker? A sibling’s friend? A bestie’s boyfriend/girlfriend? A person who didn’t even know you existed?

I need a man!

It’s as simple as that.

And then, hopefully, maybe, all of my crushes will come to an end.

Where’s a man when I need one…